Glamour magazine hilarious writer, Phoebe Robinson, had me in stitches just reading the title “Scandal Recap: If You Needed Evidence That Shonda Rhimes Doesn’t Care About Ripping Your Heart Out, Here It Is.” It takes a special soul to make me laugh after last night’s episode.
#Gladiators, after a torturous three-week hiatus, Scandal has finally returned—but someone really should have warned me that tears would floweth from my eyes like chocolate does from a fondue fountain at Golden Corral. Seriously, I was so ill-prepared for my emotions to be rising like Pillsbury croissant rolls baking in an oven that I ran out of tissues and I didn’t have any food in my apartment, so I couldn’t eat my feelings away. What I’m trying to say is Ms. Rhimes, please save the gut-wrenching episodes for when my kitchen is fully stocked with Pepperidge Farm Milano cookies and apple juice. Because right now, I’m munching on my in-case-of-emergency cheese slice and sipping tap water. Never before in my life have I no me gusta’d Gouda this hard. Anyway, as I continue to look for a sugary treat in my apartment, let’s discuss what went down on last night’s episode entitled “Seven Fifty-Two,” shall we?
We start with a flashback to five years ago. While Olivia is waiting for the metro, a homeless Huck starts talking to her in a very Rain Man sort of way, except instead of using his incredible memory to win money in Vegas, Huck knows the entire train schedule and looks like he was fired from a folk band that said, “Leave us your banjo, but feel free to take the triangle and tang-a-lang your behind down to the unemployment line.” In short, homeless Huck is a mess and that gives me a case of the sads. Olivia’s train arrives when Huck predicted it would, so she gives him some money and makes plans to have a coffee date with him the next day. Hey, Liv, you do realize he’s not going to put this meeting into his iPhone and then sync it with his Google cal, right? All you have to do is show up. Moving on….Read More
Follow Phoebe Robinson (Stand-up comic, writer, and connoisseur of all things brignorant (that’s a combination of brilliant & ignorant).)